Death

I work at a job where I see death everyday.

People dying, getting sick, getting admitted into the hospital. This is all part of my job description. I could go into work one day after 3 days of not working and sometimes 2 of my residents will have passed away.

I sometimes say good night to a resident and it crosses my mind that that could be the last time i (or anyone else for that matter) say good night to her. I close the door to their room and think that perhaps this will be the last time i say good night to them. This might be the last time I laugh at their jokes, the last time i give them a hug.

I seldom pause to think about this when I'm working. Maybe because its too depressing and time and energy consuming. But when I'm free and my thoughts are random and plentiful, I begin to realize that just because I work at a job where death is common, I start to treat it so callously. I hear that a resident has passed away, and i go, "Aww, she was a nice lady... Oh well, her time was up anyway, she had a good long life... Oh look at the time, gotta catch my bus now or i'll be late for my movie." And that's it.

What was just another little thing that happened at work today could have been a life-shattering event of another person's life. their loved ones would never see them again, never talk or laugh with them again. We even joke about deaths at work, making fun at its expense. Sometimes even when someone's death is mentioned, a co-worker might even slap her thigh and go, "Finally!" Because this particular resident might have been a fussy and nasty old lady or a very difficult character.

I should always remember that death isn't some kind of joke. It isn't some guy in a long cloak holding a sickle waiting in the corner like we see in comic books.

It's the ceasing of being, the ending of an existence. And nobody should ever treat it like its nothing.

And sometimes I hope that when my time comes, I will have reflected on my life and know that I lived it well, that I did everything I could have possibly done, no regrets, no anger, just peace. I want to remember all these wonderful people who have passed on, and be glad that I met them, entered their lives at the end of their jouneys.

The meaning of life is to give life meaning.