Save me from this friggin' heat!!

I never, EVER want to step out of my room again.
Why do so when in my room the air is cool, i can actually breathe without breaking out in sweat, and i dont have a nagging headache at the back of my head or the glare of the sun in my eyes?
see outside, its a whole different matter. its like a gret, big, gigantic furnace out there. the sun gets you wherever you stand, you sweat and sweat and sweat in all the sweltering heat till the smell of sweat seems to be like your signature scent and there's always this fear that if you stand out in the sun so much, you'll get skin cancer. which explains why i'm always looking for weird shaped moles on my skin whenever i've got free time on my hands.
Adelaide's having one of its temperamental heat waves now. And its a long, long, dreadful summer. Its actually suppose to be autumn now where the temperature is at least below 33 degrees. but no no no, for the past two weeks its been over bloody 35 degrees and even hitting 38-40 degrees on a regular basis. how can anyone not get a heat stroke from all this inhumane heat?
Please, i hope Autumn arrives soon!!!!!!